JohnnyWingnut

Taking down worlds…one Kool-Aid drinker at a time

I’ve given up hope

A short time after I joined the WordPress family, every flippin’ time I’d check my dashboard under “Top WordPress blogs” I’d see this annoying little sentence which read: “I Can Has Cheezburger.” Years later, thankfully, I no longer have to be reminded of the inanity of the human race when I check the top WordPress blogs. Unfortunately, there are plenty of other things to remind me every day that we live in a culture of distilled absurdity. But I digress…

What does it mean? (I Can Has Cheezburger) Checking their “About Us” page wasn’t really very revealing, but everyone else seems to get it, so I guess I’m just thick. Of course, I’m also a dog lover, which is probably why I don’t get the whole “Cheezburger” thing being conceptually linked to felines. Nor do I understand why this blog is so popular.

But so what? Apparently, there’s an entire internet subculture that gets its jollies talking in a strange English dialect and Photoshopping cat images. I’m not kidding here folks. It’s a real French click kind of thing. You must understand the language, the syntax, and the subliminal messages tucked inside each and every cat picture.

Thank God one doesn’t need to be in the ICHC club to get the jokes, even if the accompanying conversation is nebulous.

Seriously, though. who are these people who leave hundreds of one line comments resembling the kind of conversation you’d expect to hear at a daycare center? Except this would be a very special day care center where  the adults in charge smoked a bowl and slipped acid into the Kool-Aid.

Perhaps they’re aliens. Yes, that’s it. Aliens who live in secret among us and are sending coded messages to one another using a retarded Caesar cipher and Photoshopped kitties. It’s the perfect cover. There must be a blue million of the little bastards running around on planet earth. That would explain the otherwise seemingly inexplicable popularity of this blog.

Okay. I admit it. I’m jealous…There I said it. How can something which seems so ridiculous be so popular? It remains an enigma to me. I say, good for them…but I’m still jealous:)

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